Top 10 Good Parenting Tips – Best Advice
What Makes A Good Parent?
A good parent is someone who, in the child’s best interest, tries to make choices.
It’s not important for a good parent to be perfect. No one is perfect. No child is perfect either… When we set our goals, having this in mind is crucial.
Effective parenting is not about achieving perfection. But that doesn’t mean we’re not going to work for that purpose. Set high expectations first for ourselves, and then second for our children. For them, we act as role models.
How To Be A Good Parent – Top 10 Parenting Tips
#1 BE A GOOD ROLE MODEL
Come on, walk the walk. Don’t tell your kid, what you want them to do. Show them that.
Humans are a remarkable species in part because we can understand through imitation. We are conditioned to mimic the actions of others to understand them and to integrate them into our own. Kids, in particular, watch what their parents do very closely.
So, be the person you want your child to be—respect your child, show them the positive behavior and attitude, have sympathy for your child’s emotion—and your child will follow suit.
#2: LOVE THEM AND SHOW THEM THROUGH ACTION
There’s no such thing as loving your kid so much. Love they can’t ruin the two of them. Just what you want to do (or give) in the name of love can—things like material indulgence, leniency, low standards, and over-protection.
When these things are offered instead of true love, that’s when you’re going to have a spoiled boy.
Love your kid can be as easy as sending them hugs, spending time with them, and listening to their complaints seriously every day.
Showing these acts of affection will cause the release of feeling-good hormones such as oxytocin. These neurochemicals will give us a profound sense of peace, emotional warmth and contentment from which the infant gain tolerance, not to mention a deeper bond with you.
#3: PRACTICE KIND AND FIRM POSITIVE PARENTING
Babies are born with about 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with very few connections. These links generate our emotions, guide our acts, from our personality, and essentially decide who we are. They are formed, enhanced and “sculpted” by lifelong experiences.
Give your child any positive experiences. They would have the opportunity to experience meaningful experiences themselves and to give them to others .
Give your child any bad experiences. They’re not going to get the sort of development they need to succeed. Sing that dumb tune. Get a marathon tickle. Only go to the park. You’re laughing with your child. Ride into a tantrum of rage. Solve a dilemma with a good outlook.
Not only can these meaningful interactions build healthy relations with your child’s head, but they also make your child’s lifelong memories of you.
It is impossible to be optimistic when it comes to discipline. However, constructive reinforcement should be practiced and disciplinary actions can be avoided.
Being a decent parent means that you get to show your kid the values of what is right and what is wrong. The keys to good discipline are setting boundaries and being persistent.
Be kind and strict to the compliance of those laws. Rely on the explanation behind the actions of the kid. And making it an opportunity to learn about the future, rather than punish the past.
#4: BE A SAFE HAVEN FOR YOUR CHILD
Let your child know that you will always be there for them by being attentive to the signs of the child and listening to their needs. Support and embrace the child as a person. Be a warm, safe haven for your child to explore.
Children raised by parents who are reliably attentive appear to develop improved emotional control, cognitive skills development, and mental health outcomes.
#5: TALK WITH YOUR CHILD AND HELP THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
All of us know the importance of connectivity. Talk to your kid and listen to them closely, too.
By having the contact channel open, you’re going to have a stronger relationship with your child, and your child will come to you anytime there’s a problem.
But there’s another explanation for communication—helping your kid incorporate various aspects of his or her brain.
Integration is analogous to our body, where various organs tend to cooperate and function together to ensure a stable body.
When various areas of the brain are combined, they will function harmoniously as a whole, which means less tantrums, more cooperative actions, more empathic and greater emotional well-being.
Speak about troubling encounters to do so. Ask your child to explain what happened and how he/she felt he/she was improving tuned speech. You don’t have to come up with solutions.
#6: REFLECT ON YOUR OWN CHILDHOOD
Many of us wish to see a better adult than our own. And someone who had a strong life and a happier childhood would wish to change any facets of how they were growing up.
Yet most often, as we open our mouths, we chat exactly as our parents did.
Reflecting on our own upbringing is a journey in knowing why we parent the way we do so. Take stock about stuff that you would like to alter and learn about how you would do it better in a real situation. Try to be conscious to change your actions the next time these problems come up.
Don’t give up until you first excel. It takes effort, a lot of practice, to deliberately adjust one’s child’s methods of schooling.
#7: PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR OWN WELL-BEING
Parents, too, need relief.
Careful attention to your well-being.
Stuff like your own health or the health of your marriage are often kept on the back burner when an infant is born. If you don’t pay attention to them, they’re going to become bigger challenges down the line 8. Taking the time to improve your friendship with your partner.
Don’t be afraid to ask for support from your friends. Getting some “me time” for self-care is vital to rejuvenate the mind.
Why parents should take care of themselves emotionally and psychologically can make a major difference in their parenting and family life. If these two places fail, your child will still suffer.
#8: DO NOT SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
There is no question that for certain parents, spanking will lead to short-term enforcement, which is also a much-needed relief for parents.
This approach, though, does not show the child the right thing from the wrong. It just encourages the kid to be fearful of external repercussions. The kid is then inspired to stop being trapped instead.
Spanking your child is modeling your child’s desire to fix problems with abuse. Children who are spanked, beaten or struck are more likely to clash with other children.
They are most likely to become threats and use verbal/physical violence to settle conflicts. Later in adulthood, they are even more likely to participate in delinquency and antisocial behavior, poorer parent-child partnerships, mental health disorders, and victims of domestic violence or assault 10.
There are a host of safer approaches to discipline that have been shown to be more successful For eg, constructive discipline (Tip #3 above) and positive reinforcement.
#9: KEEP THINGS IN PERSPECTIVE AND REMEMBER YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What’s your goal of raising a child?
If you are like most parents, you want your child to do well at school, to be active, to be responsible and independent, to be polite, to have positive relationships with you and others, to be loving and compassionate, and to have a happy, safe and satisfying life.
But how much time do you spend working on these goals?
If you’re like most of your parents, you probably spend most of the day struggling to get through the day. As the writers, Siegel and Bryson, point out in their book The Entire Brain Child,
Instead of helping your child thrive, you spend most of time just trying to survive!
If you don’t want survival mode to overtake your life, step back next time you feel upset or irritated. Think of what rage and resentment is going to do to you or your kids.
Instead, find opportunities to turn a bad encounter into a positive tool for him or her. And epic tantrums can be converted into invaluable brain-sculpting experiences.
Doing this would not only help you develop a balanced outlook, but you’re still focusing on one of your core parenting goals—building a positive relationship with your kids.
#10: TAKE A SHORTCUT BY UTILIZING FINDINGS IN LATEST PSYCHOLOGY AND NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
I don’t mean shortcuts to your kids. What I mean is to take advantage of what scientists already know.
Parenting is one of the most studied areas of psychology. Many parenting methods, behaviors or traditions have been scientifically investigated, checked, perfected or debunked.
For positive parenting tips and knowledge that is validated by science, this is one of my favorite science-based parenting books, The Science of Parenting.
The application of empirical expertise is not, of course, a one-size-fits-all technique. Each child is a different child. There can be several different successful parenting strategies that you can choose according to your child’s disposition, even with the best parenting style.
For example, besides spanking, there are several better alternatives, e.g. Redirecting, reasoning, deleting rights, time-in, etc. You should pick a form of non-punitive punishment that fits well for your child.
Of course, you can still opt to use “traditional” or “old school” parenting methods (e.g. Spanking) and still get the “same” result.
According to the Diathesis-Stress Hypothesis, individuals with behavioral illness, weaknesses are more likely to acquire one when they encounter stress. Diathesis, i.e. vulnerabilities, can be biological or environmental.
Perhaps the child will be blessed to have no such vulnerabilities. They can be resilient and prevail, no matter how hard parents treat their kids.
Yet they could not be.
The value of parenting cannot however be overlooked. Why risk disruption to any of the sub-par activities if there are well-researched, stronger ones?
Taking these “shortcuts” can entail more effort on your part in the short term, but it will save you a lot of time and agony in the long run.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The good thing is, although parenting is hard, it is also very rewarding. The bad part is the rewards usually come much later than the hard work. But if we try our best now, we will eventually reap the rewards and have nothing to regret.